20 years old and never had a girlfriend.

Hey James! First of all, you need to cheer up a bit! =) Life isn't just about having a girlfriend for the sake of it! You should also be proud of who you are and how you are like! If some girls don't like you, its not you're fault, you're just not their type, same as not all girls are your type either.. I'm sure if you just try to enjoy your days and not think about it, the right girl will come along =) Take care!
Completely normal btw.

Dude, i will repeat what others say...yeah in a way it sucks, but things always look greener on the side of the fence. But it ain't true...

I didn't have my first serious relationship till I was 22 or 23...sometimes I worried about it. I was good looking boy, but in my teens I felt so awkward and got lots of acne.

Everyone has a path, a timing when they meet someone that's compatible to be more than just friends...utlimately you should always keep in mind, girlfriend or not, is am I doing some good? Everything else will follow naturally.

Best of luck to you.

dude, I was in the same boat as you not that long ago, but then I stopped worrying about trying to seduce and just being myself and that seemed to work. I guess what I am trying to say is you just have to really not give a damn about anything and do what makes you happy, hopefully the right girl will see you marching along to your beat and wish to march along...also, learn to play the ukulele, and go climb a mountain or something.

hey like the other's have said don't worry about getting a girlfriend to much. Maybe you are giving off certain desperate vibes that may be turning some of the girls you are interested off. Also just try to start off as friends all relationships start from friendships don't just approach someone in order to seduce them get to know them more first. or if you do fet in a relation ship it will not last and will be just a waste of time in the end

Hey James,

I agree with the first comment. Don't let having a girlfriend define your life. You're still young, just give it time and it'll hit you on the head when it's least expected.

Watch the movie "Hitch", It'll cheer you up and you'll find out that there are no rules.
Good luck, dude.

hey, i´m a girl and same here..
it does feel lonely sometimes, but you know.. you´ve got so much free time to explore the world without worrying about anyone. You can play this ukulele or learn how to dance hip'hop or go on an expedition to the Amason river or something..
The right person will be the one walking at the same speed, doing same things. No way she´ll pass unnoticed or will let you look the other way =)

The right girl comes along when you aren't looking.

hey dude! yeah i totally get it. for me it seems that the most attractive girls are the most dull when it comes to personality. i know what its like to be lonely without a girl. just know that who you have is not who you are. start to put value in your identity and feel good about it. dont think "what do other people think of me?" instead think of what You think of you. also put value in your friends. you dont need to be Completely alone. eventually you will find someone! but it will be much easier if you dont spend to much time thinking about it!

good luck! :D

James

My step-son is 22 years old and is in the same situation. His problem is that he works and goes home and plays video games. That's it. He doesn't put himself in situations and/or places where he can meet girls his age. He doesn't drink or use drugs (which is a good thing) so he always says, "Where am I supposed to meet someone?". He has tried the online dating and had his heart broken. He has issues with mild acne, but other wise is a great looking young man. He goes to church, but isn't interested in anyone there. He has the ideal woman in his mind, and won't settle for less. At 22 years old, a virgin (and is going to stay one until he is married), he limits himself by his own standards. If he could learn to be friends first, he may find that it is how most people become boyfriend/girlfriend. The best relationships start out as friends. He just wants to go from Hi, how are you? To... Be my girl. He doesn't understand that relationships take time, patience, understanding and nurturing. James, I think you will find the right person as soon as you stop looking. It always happens like that. I dated several men over several years and didn't get married until I was 38 years old. I'm so glad I waited, because I know I married my soulmate, my true love, the one I had been looking for. It happened just when I had given up on dating and had resigned to be an old spinster! Lol. It will happen for you when the time is right in your life. Everything happens for a reason. I found my husband on "Plentyoffish.com". I had never tried online dating and only did it to get my friends off of my back. I never expected to make a connection with anyone, let alone meet someone. We e-mailed for months, and talked on the phone for months, before I agreed to meet him in person. Needless to say, we started out as friends, and we ended up falling in love with each other. It can and will happen for you. Don't give up, just be yourself and when the time is right you'll know.

Hi James,

I'm a mid 20 year-old girl and I have got the same damn problem than you haha. I've only been in a serious relationship once, but it lasted for like...6 months? LOL. Plus,I'm a serious, very sporty girl, and I think I'm good-looking too.

It's true that when you start thinking too much about it, you wont see the opportunities that come to you in the present.

But, I agree with the fact that even if you're trying not to think about it, it's hard. My friends all have boyfriends, and yet I'm the only one that got none haha.

But hey, just wanted to tell you that I share the same feelings than you. I have got self-esteem yes, but sometimes when you stop and start thinking about relationships, you ought to turn insane lol.

If only a guy like you would fall from the sky during those moments ;). loll

Do not worry about "seduction". If a girl does not like your natural and true personality, then she is worth less than whatever may be clinging to the bottom of your shoe.

I'm a 20 year old female and am in the same situation.

I've been in your shoes james. i didnt have my first "legit" girl friend until i was 16, and it lasted 5 months...i then got into a relationship that was for 2 months..Since then i have gone for and attempted to persue other females, but like your girls..they werent into me and i always get friend zoned...so im now 18 kicking single till after grad, hoping for a change in college, so my advice is to stay positive and when you least expect it it will happen(well at least thats what im hoping for)

hope this helped :/

It's not like I want a girlfriend for some checklist or for stupid bragging rights.. I just feel lonely =/
And thanks guys =)

Congratz JAMES :-)!!!

To all the dear people who took the time and replied to my post, I'd like to say thank you.
It's been 3 years and a half since I created this post.
During this time I used to google this post about once a year and read new comments, and today, after such a long time I decided to share with you how my life has been, if any of you are still out there.
3 years ago I met my first girlfriend. It was a wonderful experience and we have been together for two years. Several months after we separated I went on a trip with a few friends to some exotic countries, where I had some really good and fun sexual experiences with various types of women.
Today I look back at the progress I've made and I am proud of myself. If any young fellas out there still get to this post, my message to you is never give up hope and keep pushing yourself out of your comfort zone, I made it this far and so can you, we are no different than each other by any means. Good luck to you and thanks again to all the wonderful people of this community, maybe I'll post again in a few years :)

Hi James,

I'm 20 as well, and I've never been in a serious relationship. I have female friends and occasional crushes, but nothings ever developed because I haven't pushed for it to. I don't mean like force someone into something, I mean ask her out, be persistent with making plans with her, update her with your feelings for her (including your want to share in a lasting relationship). I haven't done this because I want to pick the right girl and therefore I am super picky and know exactly what I want and how to identify it. Anyways, those three things I said are the key (first step) once you find the right girl. Ok, well I hope this helps and you don't abuse it.

Best wishes,
Mike

I hear what your going through. I'm 18 and never had a girlfriend though I would like one. Reading all of these comments has helped my confidence, sometimes it can be hard and you sorta feel like your the only one in the world (or atleast your world) who's single but you can't worry about that. Just gotta keep being yourself and be kind to others and eventually someone has to come along! Atleast that's my position, so live life and don't get caught up feeling bad for yourself. Things will get better.

I feel exactly the way you do, with only the gender difference. I have yet to have my first kiss, but am told I am attractive and quite unique.

I suppose there's never a true explanation for these things.

Never lower your standards, no matter how desperate the situation may seem. Perhaps there's a girl who's been just as lonely as you waiting for you down the line.

The best advice I've received is: Love will come when you're not looking for it.

I'm in the same boat man. I'm about to turn twenty one and never had a girlfriend. I have fucked 3 girls, and kissed I'd say about 7. The one girl who I fell in love with only wants me as a friend. It kind of broke my heart and I have had a difficult time because I constantly find girls I am physically attracted to, but none have measured up to her personality.

Same here...it sucks...every girl I've tried going after either isn't interested or nothing really happens.

hay james lets make a movie (then 20 year old virgin) lolololololol ok meat my teanaged daughter ok shes gonna be hangin at your place k? oh and heres my ex-wife shes a hooker ok your all set for a three man threesom :-) lololol all three of you are total dick heads OMG H4X ▲◆▼●■★☆♀♂⇔⇒¾½¼‰%¯¬µ°¹³♭•¹²³¹²³¹²³¹²³

maybe you should try men maybe u think its horrible but hv u ever tried it b4 theres a first to everything